To Kill a Cactus - One of Those Days part 5

One of Those Days part 4: HERE

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Paithoon's perspective

I felt so peaceful, drowning is almost a beautiful way to go, all of my fear and anxiety was gone, there were soft warm colours all around me, I felt like a blanket was being wrapped around me, it was warm cosy, safe and quiet. A comfortable silence though, it was the happiest I had felt in a very long time. I had nothing to worry about, nothing at all, just me. Usually, when I was alone with my thoughts I'd get scared, but at that moment everything in my mind was the clearest it had ever been, I could see the things around me from a different light, I understood how silly and small my problems had been, everything was fine in the end. People could get by without me, there were so many extremely intelligent people who could do what I wanted to do and perhaps they had already done it, maybe they were almost there, nobody really needed me, everything I could do someone else could do better, so why worry, things find a way of sorting themselves out. I was having such a nice time, I could feel the soft embrace of the water, it was all around me, I was becoming part of it.

Yes, dying was much easier than I had thought, it was even nice if I'd dare to say that now looking back at it, being brought back to life, was a whole other story. It was pure pain.

I started coughing and could feel the water crawling back out of my lungs, it was a sharp pain in my ribcage, running all the way around my body as if I had been beaten and slammed around. I also felt cold, my clothes and hair were soaked with water and there was a slight breeze that felt like a storm against my skin.

"Wonderful, you're awake," said the man sitting next to me, he had a soft deep voice with a slight accent I didn't recognise. He was the one who was holding on to me during the attack so my reflexes tried to make me get away from him, but everything hurt so much that I just ended up looking like an earthworm wiggling on the ground.

"I'm sorry that I scared you, I was trying to help you, but I was too late," he seemed sad, I was trying to read him, but his expression went back to serious so quickly as if he was putting up a guard. It seemed far too familiar to me since I did the same most of the time as well.

I tried to say something, but even breathing was painful that I gave up.

"It's better if you don't talk right now, I'll take you to the medical area and then after you're better we can talk, is that fine with you?" he seemed genuinely worried, but I wasn't sure if going with him was the best choice, I had to find Ash.

As if he could understand what I was thinking, he said: "There's nothing we can do for your friend right now, you need to gather your strength and then I'll help you, I promise."

Since I was in the habit of constantly making wrong decisions, I nodded and he picked me up as if I didn't weigh anything. Everything still hurt, but somehow it felt like a nice pain, it reminded me that I was still alive and that's what I wanted, I had a mission and I believed in myself even if nobody else did.

I looked up at the strange man, it was so difficult to understand him, he didn't seem old nor young, he didn't seem bad nor good, he just seemed human and I liked that.

There was one hell of a day behind me, but I guess it was just one of those days, I have a lot of those in my arsenal.

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To be continued