To Kill a Cactus - Bury Me part 4

Bury Me part 3: HERE

...

I was certain that I should've run out of blood when I was looking at the amount of it covering my clothes, the table I was laying on and Christopher's hands that were patching me back together. I could see that he felt guilty, but it wasn't his fault. That hadn't happened before, so it must've been me that was broken not him.

Ash had run in when he heard me screaming, Cecilia was right behind him. It took us a while to explain what had happened, especially with me still in shock and screaming, I was silent now, my throat was dry and felt sore, tears had evaporated from my skin leaving it tingling. Cecilia and Ash were whispering in the corner, it hurt my ears, I wanted them to either talk up or go completely quiet the area inbetween made me feel extremely uncomfortable.

"I think this is it, luckily none of the wounds were deep," Christopher finally sighed and put his first aid kit away.

"Thanks," I mumbled barely getting the words out of my mouth.

I tried to sit upright, but my skin felt so tight everywhere as if I had suddenly been put into a skin a few sizes too small for my body.

The sun behind the window was setting already, the days seemed to be getting shorter so fast and so went by another day wasted, we didn't get any new information and we didn't get any further in our journey. I must admit I felt like giving up. This was not what I bargained for and now I didn't even know what I had bargained for. I was naive to believe that I could save anyone, I couldn't even save myself. I felt sad and small and incapable.

Christopher stood near the window, I could see that his mood wasn't any lighter than mine, something was bothering him and I felt like it was me, perhaps he now believed that I was indeed the doom of everything. I looked down at my scratched up arms, for some reason it made me miss Mr Purrball, my cat, who was a little insane and sometimes scratched up my arms when I tried to cuddle him.

Suddenly I felt a strong pull towards the door, it seemed as if there was a cord tied around my heart and I had the urge to simply step out and run, run towards where my heart was pulling me, run and never look back. I looked down on my arms, it almost seemed like my blood trembled moving away for me. I hadn't even noticed when I got down from the table and landed on the ground. My legs couldn't keep me up though and I fell to the ground, everything hurt, I closed my eyes and drifted away.

I could hear Christopher say something from a distance, but it was all a blur, I just let it go.

I felt like I was moving, there was air on my skin, wind in my hair, I opened my eyes and I was in a bright room, everything felt different, I moved as fast as wind through the hallways, people were running from me, one of the women opened a door and tried to hide, but I knew she had to die, so I went after her. I pushed open the door she had tried to barricade from me, I wanted her soul, her blood on my hands, then I realised that she was the nurse, my nurse, she was down on her knees begging in front of my cage in the hospital to help her, but I did nothing and now I was running towards her with hunger in me, hunger to rip her apart, from the corner of my eye I could see the past me hiding under the covers. 

There was blood everywhere, I wanted to stop, wanted to shake it away and help her. I could feel myself floating away again, I was out from the zombie, I stood there a few meters away and looked at the disaster scene from a completely different angle, I felt odd, somehow what I saw made me happy, I didn't want it to.

Christopher ran in with a few other helpers, who tased the zombie and dragged him away. Christopher was looking straight at me though, I was invisible to others, but not to him. I could feel my face turn into a smile, I waved at him and jumped out of the open window.

Then I was back in my body, Christopher was holding me firmly in his grip, I could see blood dripping down from my wounds again, my heart was pounding as if I had indeed just killed somebody.

"What was that?" I asked

...

To Be Continued